Answers · The hard days

What is Collaborative and Proactive Solutions?

Ross Greene's approach, built on the claim that children do well if they can, so challenging behavior is a missing skill rather than a missing motivation.

Ross Greene's model, known as CPS and set out in The Explosive Child, is the strongest challenge to the whole idea of rewarding behavior, and it is worth taking seriously rather than arguing with.

The claim

Children do well if they can. Where they cannot, the cause is lagging cognitive skills — flexibility, frustration tolerance, problem solving — rather than permissive or inconsistent parenting. On that reading, a child who melts down at transitions is not unmotivated. They lack a skill, and no amount of incentive supplies one.

The three plans

PlanWhat it isWhen
AYou decide, and impose itSafety. Otherwise it is what produces the explosion
BYou and the child solve it together, addressing both sets of concernsThe main work. Done proactively, not mid-crisis
CSet the expectation aside for nowWhen there are too many problems at once and something has to give

Plan B is the method. It is done on a calm day, not during the difficulty, and it starts by finding out what the child's concern actually is rather than assuming it is defiance.

What he is right about

That a chart cannot teach a skill a child does not have. If mornings fall apart because the morning is genuinely disorganized, no number of points will supply the missing structure, and a chart in that situation quietly becomes a weekly record of a child failing at something they were never equipped for. That is a real failure mode and it is common.

Where the two fit together

Plan B works out what the actual problem is and produces a solution both people can live with. What it does not do is make the practicing visible. A child who has agreed a plan and is now doing the harder thing four mornings out of seven has done something significant, and unless somebody is counting, the only feedback available is whether today went wrong.

Solve the problem with Plan B. Then notice, out loud and durably, that they are doing the thing they agreed. Those are not competing answers, and a house with a difficult child usually needs both.

Last updated 2026-09-09.

Read next
See what this is

How it works · Answers · Worlds · The thinking · What we hold about your child · The deal